


Remembrance

by shnuffeluv



Category: The Two Princes (Podcast)
Genre: Amnesia, Angst and Tragedy, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Past Character Death, Stuck in a Mirror Universe and Character is Slowly Forgetting Original Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:08:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28235190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shnuffeluv/pseuds/shnuffeluv
Summary: All Amir wants is to remember. But that's hard when he's missing his journal.
Relationships: Amir/Rupert (Two Princes Podcast)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 11
Collections: Bulletproof 20/21





	Remembrance

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Snickfic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snickfic/gifts).



Amir was tearing up his room, looking desperately for the soft leather bound journal he had been keeping secret from his mother for the last year and a half. She couldn't have found it and thrown it out, she couldn't have! Surely she wouldn't be that cruel! If the doctors said this was unhealthy, well, they just didn't know the truth! And the truth sounded strange, sometimes, even to his own ears, but he wasn't going to give up! He knew! He knew that Rupert and him had both survived the Hollow, and they had fought Malkia, and had gotten their happily ever after. Even if it was only for one night.

Even if he only got one night with his husband before he woke up in this hell.

He didn't know if he had been dropped into some alternate dimension, or if someone had messed up in their time-travel, or what. Science wasn't that advanced, and he couldn't think of anyone who would have stolen away his happy life with magic.

At first, he had written only his fondest memories of Rupert and himself in the journal. He wanted to remember the good times. Have something to look forward to when it came time for him to go home. But as time went on, and he proved stuck here, he wrote down the bad times too, all the times he could remember, even after the amnesia incident, and anything he remembered during it. He had slowly been starting to forget pieces of the alternate universe, here and there, and it was breaking his heart. Lately, he could only remember a few things, and he had to read the journal to remember more.

He tore apart his bookshelf, desperately looking for the book. His memories of Rupert were hazy. Were his eyes brown or hazel? How happy had he been that Amir had returned after the spell had been broken? How did their honeymoon go? Where had they planned to end up?

What had their wedding been like?

Amir scrambled to find a pillow and scream into it. He sniffled, wishing that he could remember the way that Rupert smelled laying in bed next to him. He wished he could remember the weight of his wedding ring on his finger.

He wished he had any scrap of proof that he hadn't imagined a happier life in the first place.

His mother knocked on his open door and he turned to her, somewhat guiltily. He knew that she hated when he went on about his life with Rupert. He wouldn't put it above her to remove the book if she found it and the doctors said it wasn't healthy. She looked around. "Are you renovating?" she asked drily.

"I can't find one of my books," Amir said in frustration. "One of my journals, it was an important one, I need it back!"

"This wouldn't be the one where you wrote out your fantasies with that Rupert, would it?" she asked.

"They weren't fantasies! They were real!" he insisted sharply. "And you're not supposed to know about it! You're not supposed to go snooping through my room looking for proof that I'm well or ill!"

"My son, I know you took the death hard, but--"

"But nothing!" Amir interrupted. "He was the love of my life, and we only got one night together!" As he started to break down crying, he admitted his greatest sin, "I never even got to say goodbye to him..."

His mother sighed. "Amir, you have been working yourself into a frenzy over that book and every time you read it you get upset. You've been adjusting so well, it's for the best that you move past this."

"What did you do with the book?" he asked, feeling his wits fraying like the last pieces of rope desperately clinging to each other.

His mother wouldn't look him in the eyes.

"What did you do?!" Amir pressed.

His mother levelled him with a stare. "I had it burned."

"No!" Amir exclaimed, running to his mother and shaking her shoulders roughly. "Don't you see, that was my last connection to him! I need it back! Tell me it's not gone!"

"I oversaw the burning this morning," his mother said. "Calm down, Amir. Surely, you can pull yourself together?"

Amir laughed incredulously. "You may as well have killed him yourself!" he accused. "I have to remember...I have to write down what I remember!"

He rushed to his desk but his mother dragged him away. "No...no! Mother!" he exclaimed. "Mother, _please!"_

His mother sighed. "Amir, until you can calm down and see sense, I am not allowing you back in that room!"

Amir cried, a broken, primal sound that burned in his throat as the last pieces of rope finally snapped. He had lost his husband. He had lost his husband, and was never getting him back. "No...no..." he muttered, even as Atossa dragged him to the waiting doctors in the hall. "I need...I need him...Just please, let me back...I just want him back..."


End file.
